Tired of fighting-only HE has the power

I'm so tired.
Tired of the fight
Of running from Your Light
And running from True Life.
I'm tired of my flesh controlling
And my soul not patroling
My soul asleep in the midst of the war
Cannot protect, so my heart is torn

I'm tired of the arguements
Of lies and untaken hints
So tired of trying to prove right
That you've wronged me in my sight
That you don't know the Truth that you do
And so, again, I have lost you.

I'm tired of the manipulation,
Trying to control every relation.
Playing mind games to "win" their love
When all I want is the One Above.
Using whatever I can to gain a "friend"
Only to find it didn't work in the end.

I know I'm the wrong in each situation
Because I'm so tired of being alone.
But do I prefer the confusion and chaos
Or can I finally see that I am not lost?
That Your hand guides along still waters
And I will rejoice with your other daughters.

I keep striving and going and reaching
Keep yearning and learning and teaching.
But the problem through it all is the me and the I
Because now I know that You are the only guy
Who can do all I fail to do, Jesus alone! Not me
And He doesn't even need my help, its not we.

In His power alone I get through the day
Rise up on wings like eagles as they say.
But it is all His power within me
That produces anything of beauty
So why try and yearn and strive
When all I have to do is abide

God, thank You for showing me this throughout the events of the day. That everything in and of my self is utterly worthless, but in every area that You have restored, redeemed, renewed, there can be good to spring out, but only in Your power. Apart from You I am nothing. Let me ever abide in You. Let me never lose my sight of the Vine nor the Vinedressor. Let my fruit be ever ripening and the pruning well worth the trouble and pain. In Jesus's name alone, where there is the power to change all things, amen.